I didn’t mean to mock,” he said in the lengthy video. “This wasn’t a ‘Fuck you to you people. Fuck you to the Christians.’ It was not that”

He’s repenting.

On Friday, Lil Nas X released his new single “J Christ” — complete with a video of him being strapped to a cross. Now, the pop star is addressing the backlash he’s faced for his Christianity-referencing rollout. In a video posted Monday, the singer apologized for some of his approach to promoting the music.

“This is not to try to get everybody on my good side or whatnot. This is more so to clear my head about my own decisions. I know I messed up really bad this time,” he said in the clip. “And I can act unbothered all I want but it’s definitely taking a mental toll on me.”

Lil Nas opened the four-and-a-half-minute video by saying he wanted to “explain where my head is at” and not necessarily apologize for “J Christ,” though he later said sorry for some aspects of his promotional tactics for the single. He explained that he knew his single artwork would lead to some people getting upset because “religion is a sensitive topic,” but that he never intended to offend with it.

“I didn’t mean to mock. This wasn’t a ‘Fuck you to you people. Fuck you to the Christians.’ It was not that. It was ‘I’m back like Jesus,’” Lil Nas said. “I’m not the first person to dress up as Jesus. I’m not the first rapper, I’m not the first artist, and I won’t be the last.”

The musician, who could be seen pacing around the same room during the video, then apologized for a TikTok video where he’s seen eating communion bread and drinking wine from a chalice while dressed as Jesus, saying he intended to “lighten the mood” with it, and not stir more controversy.